A friend asked me this morning if I needed anything before my next surgery. I asked her if she had any patience I could have... :)...in a way I totally mean it! As this next surgery gets closer and closer I find myself getting more nervous and antsie everyday!! But then I still have one LONG week of waiting (and lots of work) to do before ... before I am helpless again an have a long stretch of recovery.
There are definately two side to these feeling. One being the fact that I just want all of this behind me! I will not post another blog update about leakages, but let me just say that they are part of my life right now, and something I have to face while I still have this ileostomy. So there are times when all I want is to just be done with all this, and fast!
The other side is what I am feeling more strongly as the days grow closer to surgery. That is the fact that I am submitting myself to what I now know will be the outcome of a major surgery. That outcoome is weakness, and helplessness, and pain...lots of pain, and new trials to face (eg. the ileostomy) with each step of this long process to recovery. 95% of the time my eyes are on the end...the strength and wellness of what I will be when this is all over and I am my new "normal" as a J-Poucher! Right now its on the present, and right now the present is scary to me!
So please, as you all did so faithfully last time. Pray for me. I need alot of it right now. And if any of you have any of that patience I was talking about earlier that I could have, please just send it on my way!! :)
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You're praying for patience! You've heard the warnings about that right?
ReplyDeleteEvery once in a while someone will, in amazement, ask me "how did you ever raise 3 girls all by yourself?" The simple answer to that questions is: "I did what I had to do". It's the truth. And your truth is: you will get through this because you have to. I know it's scary (I'm scared too). I know it's the pits for you (I don't even want to watch) but I also know that you can bear it. Patient or not! Don't put any pressure on yourself to do it in any special way or not be antsie or scared. That's normal! Just hang on, honey. Hang onto God (Phil 4:13) and all the people who love you. Hang onto your own strength and endurance. You'll be on the other side before you know it.
Mom
Just look how fast my little girl grew up!
ReplyDeleteMom
(teardrop)....:) Thanks mom!!! Love you!
ReplyDeleteDear Jess, We are praying for you - for strength and courage to go through another surgery - and for the surgeon to have wisdom as he does what is needful to get you well! What a blessing it is to know that the Lord is in control! Love you, Mrs. Simpson
ReplyDeleteYou are in my thoughts and prayers more than you can imagine. My heart is with you. Be strong friend! You can do it!!
ReplyDeleteLove, Abby
Dear Jess,
ReplyDeleteHello from Brazil. Just wanted to let you know that we,the Bob Nichols family,are praying for you. I know that all these trials,pain, and hardships... are allowed by our Omniscient,Almighty Father to fulfill His perfect will and plan for your life. "His will will never take you where His grace cannot keep you." WE love you!! God bless you!! Keep trusting HIM!!!! God is faithful!!!!!
Your Friend,
Heather Cherie Nichols