This is the first times I got "out" after surgery. We took grandma to Lady Bird Johnson Wildflower Center with my mom and Katie before she left. The day was one of the hottest we have had so far all spring, and I wilted very fast! :) It was still so nice, and all the wildflowers this year are just beautiful because of all the rain we've gotten. David sat with me half the time in the quaint little cafe there while I hydrated and got cool.
It was a special time with my family!
In my last blog update I explained to you the extreme pain has been for me, and wont repeat that in detail. All I can say is that the infection is continuing to grow. It is spreading further down and around my stoma, and changing the bag sometime is unbearable. David has been such an angel and is always so calm and patient with me. I don't think I could have done any better!! Something else that I have been battling is sleep. For some reason my nights have been restless. Often I lay awake for 2 hrs trying to be patient to fall asleep. But once I do drift off I wake up every hour and just can't seem to dose into that deep sleep. On top of it all the pain has its part of waking me up several time at night as well.
We are to the point of counting down the days till my next surgery. Of course though there are pros and cons to everything! The other night when I couldn't sleep I was on the computer reading for a long time about the long first weeks after the Take-Down surgery. I have to admitt that it have got me kinda scared. I am not looking forward to going through it all. I read that in a way it is harder mentally at times than physically. That for the first few weeks after take-down it is a sort of dea ja vue of living with the Colitis again. I know i can't get to the other side without going through it, but I am scared. Even in the know, I say Bring It On!! :) (well you can ask me about that in the middle of all the "butt burn" :) haha)
My doctor has me on some colesterol medicine that I am taking solely for the side effects. It is supposed to help thicken the stool and decrease the acidity. So we will see. My apt with the surgeon is in 6 days, and that is something else I just wish I could sleep through! When your doc tells you up front to take to strong vicaden before the apt, you know its going to be bad! Told David I need him there for me....."I don't want to sit there and watch you be in pain" he says. "Too bad!" I really need the morral support!
I have a dr apt tomorrow with my obgyn to talk to her more about the ovarian cyst they found in the MRI. I am very interested in finding out more about it, and also how much more of an effect it can have on me getting pregnant. I know chances are very low already. The surgeon told us that after 3 major abdomonal surgeries there is so much scar tissue in and around all the female organs it is hard to concieve. Now on top of that I find out about a large ovarian cyst. Its hard! Its so hard! David and I talk about it all the time and how different our lives would be if JoLynn were with us. I miss her so much my heart aches!! Will I be able to have another child to hold in my arms?....Only the Lord know.
Dear Jess, My heart goes out to you in all that you are going through! All I can say is that I pray for you very often that the Lord will continue to give you grace and mercy during this time! (for David, too) I appreciate your coming out to church when you can and of having such a sweet spirit in the midst of this great trial! You are amazing! Love you dearly, Mrs. Simpson
ReplyDeleteJessica,
ReplyDeleteDont fear the pregnancy issue at this point. Dont focus on that. Focus on getting better for the take down. I didnt have three phase surgery but I did have two and my doctor was always positive when we talked about adding to our family. One doctor in his practice that ugh gets me upset to my core told me that I would need to work with a specialist to get pregnant again and there probably wouldnt be any room due to the jpouch. When I told my surgeon about this at my two week post opt visit. He just smiled and said "non sense." The j pouch doesnt take up that much room. You'd already have a c section when you deliver(I had two prior so it's my only option) and it is very low that I'd have to work with a specialist as He was VERY careful with all my "girl" parts when in surgery because he knew I might not be done. So dont fret about that...I know, easier said than done right. However for now...focus on getting well. Third surgery and recovery from that. Your time will come! The Lord will provide!
I'm so glad you got to get out and enjoy a little beauty with your family - you needed that!
ReplyDeleteSeriously Jessica, tell your doctor you want some conscious sedation drugs if the exam he is doing is that painful (though I still can't imagine what he's going to do) - but that would be something they might need to coordinate prior to your visit - so if you do want that, I'd call before your appointment to ask them if they could do it.
About the scar tissue affecting your ability to get pregnant - I know that's a possibility, but it isn't necessarily what happens to everyone. My OB was able to do an internal exam and tell me that it seemed like my ovaries were still pointing in the direction they needed to and that the scar tissue didn't seem to have affected that (but I have other reasons pregnancy isn't recommended). She said that even if scar tissue made it difficult for the eggs to get where they needed to go, invitro would be a possibility. So . . . for what that's worth . . .
Thinking of you every day and counting down the days with you!!
Hug, Abby
Wow, Jess! So much that you have to think about all the time. I don't know how you do it. Try not to borrow worry from tomorrow! We are all praying for you. Hope it all goes better than you can imagine. We love you. If all else fails, I have always wanted to be a surrogate mother, so............ :) Lots of love and prayers to you and David!!
ReplyDeleteHello, I can not image the pain. I had Galstones and that was bad enough. I sure would not want to face something like you are. I hope all is getting better. I have actually come across some gel that might help the infection unless it is internal and just effecting the skin. If you would like take a look at the silver solution and gel at www.nutronix.com/cgwatson78. There are a lot of videos that show that this stuff kills infection bacterial and viral. The videos are not on the website but if you would like I can give you the link to some. God Bless and hope that everything goes good for the next surgery.
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